Hi. My name is Alduin Atavuli. I forgot what Step 3 was, so I went to go back to it and I got lost. I did however bump into someone who apparently knew me from that last Corp. So I thought I'd share this conversation with you!!
jayyell > ey ald wats happened ?
Alduin Atavuli > So I see from your bio that you're super emo.
jayyell > .....not really a gd judge of character r u
Alduin Atavuli > Honestly I'm not very good at most things...
Alduin Atavuli > For example, I can't even remember how we know each other.
Alduin Atavuli > You're not one of those people from CEFED who solicited me for pictures are you?
jayyell > lool the fuk ?
jayyell > is this u or your bro ?
jayyell > ....or u just a split personality all round
Alduin Atavuli > Wait a minute....
Alduin Atavuli > You're, you're not that Brazillian sex-slave I inquired about are you? The one with skin like bronze, hair like sheepskin and a mouth like waxed sandpaper?
jayyell > the very one
Alduin Atavuli > YES! YES YES YES YES!
Alduin Atavuli > Okay, let's go:
Alduin Atavuli > I put on my robe and wizard hat.
Alduin Atavuli > ...
Alduin Atavuli > ...
jayyell > rofl
Alduin Atavuli > Here, I'll help out:
Alduin Atavuli > You take off your ragged leather boots and wool socks
Alduin Atavuli > An animal, dressed in the skins of other animals, your carniverous eyes undress me brutishly
Alduin Atavuli > My robe explodes in a fireball of ecstatic bliss, sweet yet painful, pining at the thought of your manhood penetrating out of your spun-wool leggings.
Alduin Atavuli > Your larger-than life hands reach for my hat
Alduin Atavuli > "DON'T TOUCH MY FUCKING HAT!" I scream, slapping you in the face.
jayyell > lmaoo
Alduin Atavuli > "You cunt-mongering bitch," the retort stings worse than my fingers from your stone-like features.
Alduin Atavuli > "I'm sorry, baby," I say, "It's that time of the month."
Alduin Atavuli > "If I wanted excuses I would have called your sister."
Alduin Atavuli > That hurts as well, but mostly it's really fucking hot. My lips moisten... all four of them.
Alduin Atavuli > Your nipples become wet - I stop briefly to ponder why your male nipples are lactating, or why males even have nipples at all, but decide that I don't care. I suckle the sweet life-giving juices from your breasts. You are my mother, I am your child.
Alduin Atavuli > Your shaft slips between my thighs.
Alduin Atavuli > I am upset by your silence.
Alduin Atavuli > I narrate the destruction of your body, by way of my magic. Behold:
Alduin Atavuli > You are on the phone with your guy-friend. I say "guy-friend" because I'm too nice to say "boyfriend, you fucking faggot."
Alduin Atavuli > Upset with my own bisexual tendencies, I unthinkingly decide to take out my own shame and confusion on your prepubescent face.
Alduin Atavuli > Hearing my footsteps and ragged breath, you turn to face me. I stand a full six feet taller than you. I am a giant among men, and a woman at that.
Alduin Atavuli > You gasp.
Alduin Atavuli > I let down my pants.
Alduin Atavuli > You gasp again.
Alduin Atavuli > I squat down, spreading my knees and exposing the inner workings of my womanhood
Alduin Atavuli > You aren't sure whether to smile or scream.
Alduin Atavuli > You gasp.
Alduin Atavuli > In a fit of rage, delight, and general dimentia I grab your head with both hands and shove your face into my snatch.
jayyell > do you hear that........thats the sound of the nurse asking you to get back in your padded room o7
Alduin Atavuli > I flex muscles most women don't know they have, and pull your body inside of me. You are reverse-birthed. That is to say, killed. You die.
Alduin Atavuli > I gasp.
